5 Traits to recognize a sociopath

Topic: Sociopath Men

sociopathic dude

For years I wondered how in the world could I have attracted a sociopath like my children’s father. I blamed myself the majority of those years. There were even times where I felt I deserved someone like him. Not because I did anything wrong, but because I wasn’t good enough to have anyone better.  It wasn’t until recently, I realized that I attracted a sociopath for a  husband because I had a sociopath for a  father.


Hell of a Sociopath

My earliest memory of my dad was when I was 7 years old. It was actually the day he and my mom married. He walked into my grandparents living room with a red tank top on and blue jeans with a Budweiser in his hand. My mom was gleaming from ear-to-ear as if she had won the prize of the century. I on the other hand sat alone in my grandparents hallway. Not watching one second of their ceremony. I was happy that I could wear my pretty yellow Easter dress. However, as I played with the buckle of my white patent leather shoes, even still today, I can see vividly the sadness on my face. Maybe it was my previous experiences with him, but it was as  if I knew my life was about to become a living hell.

Growing up with a sociopathic father was exactly that; it was pure hell. My brother and I were beaten more than often. Almost daily we were verbally and emotionally abused. We were constantly made to feel like we were burdens. There was absolutely nothing that we could do right. 

We were beaten with weight belts, extension cords, fist, clothes hangers, or anything else within arm’s reach. Although most of the beatings were in fact quite brutal, I have a memory of one in particular that would make the worst of those seem to be mere discipline if compared. This particular beating is the perfect gateway into the mind of a sociopathic father.


Face of a Sociopath

I honestly could not tell you what we did to get the beatings we were getting. The reasons varied. Once I got beat because I left too much potato in the skin of the potato I was peeling for dinner. Another time I ended up with a black eye because a liquid spilled on the rails of his tailgate from the garbage bag I was putting on the back of his truck.


This particular  beating he didn’t beat me with the usual extension cord or weight belt. He beat me with a two-by-four that was literally  2 inches thick. As most of our beatings he made me bend over with my hands touching his weight bench. I don’t know what possessed me to look over my left shoulder. I can only guess the fear of what was about to come. When I looked over my shoulder I could see him hauling the two-by-four over his head to the point his arms were practically behind his head. I could literally see in his face how he was biting his bottom lip that he was doing this to gain the momentum and strength to hit me as hard as he possibly could. And he did.


When the two by four landed against my eight or nine year old body it split and so did my right hip. For weeks I walked around limping with a big gash in my hip. But it wasn’t the raw flesh of my gash that haunted me all my life. It was what I saw in his face when I looked over my shoulder. A look of gratification being able to hit me with the force of all his strength.

5 Traits to Recognize a sociopath

My dad and my kids’ dad personality traits are practically identical. However, as one of my therapists put it, I went from the frying pan, which was my father, to the fire, which was my kids father. Here are 5 sociopathic traits that both my dad and my kids’ dad have in common. 




  1. He is physically abusive. Will beg for forgiveness and blame you, someone else or anything else besides himself for the abuse. 
  3. He is a totally different person around other people. Confusing right. But his canny charm and charisma to others will always make you believe that there is some good in him. Only to be drawn back into the glossy beddy eyes of his verbal, emotional, and physical attacks when others aren’t around. 
  5. He lies about everything. Even the smallest of things. His lies are so calculated that he will have you second guessing yourself. 
  7. He abuses drugs or alcohol or both.
  9. He deliberately isolates you from your family and friends. 

Being in any form of relationship with any person who has ONE of these personality traits should have you planning your escape. In fact, I beg you to. Nothing good will ever come of the connection. In fact, more times than not, relationships with these types of individuals end up deadly. Mentally, spiritually, and even physically.

Thug Therapy aims to bring you relatable content aimed to awaken awareness about mental health and spark conversations about mental health in the black community. The contents of Thug Therapy Lifestyle Blog website, such as text, graphics, images, and other material contained on the Thug Therapy Lifestyle Blog website (“content”) are for informational purposes only. The content is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your mental health professional or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding your condition. Never disregard professional advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on the Thug Therapy Lifestyle Blog website. The one thing we have learned in our journey to wellness and wholeness is just as we all are different, so will our treatment plans. Thug Therapy Lifestyle Blog is meant to provide a peek into the reality of someone living with depression and cptsd.

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